happiness_balanceThe Declaration of Independence of the USA has within it an imbalanced priority, which no one is talking about. We have all fallen into the trap, and yet most people still don’t know that it even exists.

It touches almost every aspect of our lives. It could be driving our actions right this minute.

Do you know what it is?

“Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.”

Did you catch that? We were fed a belief, passed on from the year 1792.

We were programmed to believe that we are to pursue happiness. Continue reading “Do you subscribe to the Happiness Myth?” »

biorefelct-leadership-logo-transparentWe were not born into a blank slate. We were born into a complicated world with lots of existing momentum.

We have a lot of control over what we believe and where we focus our attention, but we do not have control over the way the world is right now at this moment. When we can accept this, it becomes much easier to focus our attention on how we can make the world a place which feels more like home to us. When we start creating and stop reacting, real magic comes about.

Continue reading “Born into Purpose: Origins of the Game” »

We all want to BE MORE PRESENT in order to get things done and move forward in our lives. And we are constantly told the value of PRESENCE. But what is it exactly? We made a video to demystify this topic!

being_witnessedThe basics of authentically being seen

Most people have a fear of being seen for who they really are. People also typically crave attention of some kind, at the same time. This  interesting combination creates an internal environment in which we behave in a slightly or extremely forced way to subtly manipulate the perspective of others around us. Being seen authentically by others is so important for the healing process, because we are so accustomed to hiding that this actually shows us who we really are.  By being seen in an authentic way, we tend to attract people who yearn for truth and we drive away people who prefer to hide. By receiving the reflections of other humans, or other animals (such as horses, dogs, and cats), we perceive a more startling reflection than a mirror can ever provide us.

Continue reading “On Being Seen” »

Option 1) Have this blog read to you:

Option 2) Read it yourself:

In relationships with our family, lovers, or friends, there is a game that is very often played. This game is ‘Who’s the Parasite?‘. In order for someone to determine if they are involved in playing this game, one can simply ask themselves, “Do I ever avoid looking bad?” and, “Do I ever accuse others of…anything?” Games can be very helpful, or very damaging. This happens to be quite a destructive game, which psychologists refer to as “Narcissism”. If you’ve ever heard the phrase “You can be right, or you can be happy”, this is speaking directly to narcissistic tendencies.

Continue reading “Power Struggles” »

Other FolderMetaphor time: When we receive Facebook messages from someone outside of our Facebook network, they are automatically compiled into a folder entitled “Other”. This indicates that the message inside this folder may not be relevant to us.

Facebook is attempting to spare us from inconvenient or unwelcomed information. Sometimes, however, messages from wonderful new friends don’t make it to our primary inbox – they get sent to the “Other” folder through this automatic filtering process. Continue reading “3 Things We Learned from Our “Other” Folder” »


Let’s talk a bit about passivity – one of the most misunderstood modes of being in our modern day. Passivity is often misunderstood as kindness. People intending to be polite often keep their mouths shut about their needs in order to ‘not rock the boat’.

While there are benefits to keeping up with the status quo, it is our authentic self that suffers at the expense of pleasing others.

The name of our company, True Participation, is more than just “fully” participating. “Truly” Participating means that we are honoring how we feel at our core. If we are being true to ourselves, it means that we have our own backs, and that we can trust ourselves to act (or refrain) in a way that we will feel good about in the future.

Here are four simple reminders of how you may honor yourself by speaking your truth:
Continue reading “4 Ways We Can Stop Poisoning Ourselves With Passivity” »


Any transition serious enough to alter your definition of self will require not just small adjustments in your way of living and thinking but a full-on metamorphosis. The best way to minimize the creation of new trauma in this process is to understand the elements involved. Whether we notice it or not, our lives are in constant change and learning to develop deep compassion for ourselves during our many seasons can help us experience great joys during challenging times.

Continue reading “Understanding the Phases of Life Transitions” »

decisionsWe’re in the process of making some really big decisions. They may not be big for you, but they are REALLY big for us.

Isn’t it interesting that a decision is only BIG if you ask someone that cares about it? Doesn’t it seem much less significant if it’s not happening to you?

This is what powerful decision making is all about – seeing it from another perspective. Some people actually go around asking all of their friends for their advice, but there is a way to get an outside perspective without having to ask anyone. Continue reading “5 Steps for Making Tough Decisions” »


Living day to day in our modern world can sometimes be stressful, gotta take the kids to school, gotta call the plumber, gotta pay the bills, who has time for emotions?
It may sound like a stretch, but if emotions are the waves our ship is sailing upon, it’s best to know how to navigate the waters.

Here are some simple ways on how you can do just that: Continue reading “5 Ways To Be In Touch With Your Emotions” »

handsA lot of people live by the mantra “I hate money”, while at the same time trying to earn it and create it. Does that sound healthy for people on either side of transactions?  It’s unlikely that this mindset has created more abundance or a better experience for anyone, ever.


Continue reading “Business can be Beautiful” »


More and more, we find ourselves stumped with relationship challenges that all of our parents advice couldn’t have prepared us for. Couples move in together…some tie the knot and some don’t…some sustain long distance relationships via virtual interface,etc. We are indeed living in very interesting times.

Now, with that said, there are some key factors that remain unchangeable when it comes to creating and sustaining a relationship on a solid foundation.  I’m going to share some first hand nuggets of wisdom that I’ve acquired during my love life.

Continue reading “5 Truths to Help your Relationship Thrive” »



When something breaks, most people become distraught. They tend to feel helpless, or worse. This generally means they’ll need to take it to get repaired, or get a new one. It’s not often that people take things into their own hands and look “under the hood” to fix it themselves. It certainly takes a dose of courage to ask, “If I wanted to fix this myself, what replacement parts would I need, and what servicing tools would be necessary to install those parts?”. Continue reading “Courage to Look Under the Hood” »


Have you ever listened in on people speaking in a foreign language? After a while of listening to them go back and forth you may have figured out the nature of the conversation and what each of them felt.

That’s because you picked up on the intonations in the persons voice while they we’re delivering information to each other. Even if you had been blind folded you would have been able to read all of their cues by the rise and fall of their words. Continue reading “What Voice Intonation says about you” »


Manipulation has certainly got a bad wrap, hasn’t it? People often manipulate each other in order to get what they want, without considering the goodwill of others. However, any sense of control is manipulation. If in the process of negotiating an agreement and coming up with a fair compromise, even this is a conversational manipulation – so it’s not always a bad thing. Very often, in fact, manipulation is intended to be beneficial to the receiver – and this is exactly the purpose of morals within stories. They create subtle manipulations in order to help someone lose or gain ideas.

Some examples of unhealthy manipulation….

Continue reading “Healthy Manipulation” »

Screen Shot 2015-11-25 at 3.26.01 PMFor some people, reconnecting with old friends brings up a lot of painful feelings and feels like a nightmare – especially if it ended on a sour note. For others, living in the past is an obsessive and oftentimes destructive hobby. Somewhere in the middle, however, lies a wonderful porthole into remembering how we’ve changed from who we were. Continue reading “The Power of Reconnecting with old Friends” »


We made a trip up to The Hermitage of Santa Barbara, where the whimsical world of HermiTed lives.
The place was best described to us before arriving by our friend, whom called it “the place where Alice in wonderland meets salvador Dali’s subconscious”. Sure enough as the tour unfolded we confirmed his statement to be true . It was wonderful.

Continue reading “Grown-Ups in Adventure Land” »

“The quantity of motion of a moving body, measured as a product of its mass and velocity.”


Momentum is typically only applied to objects, but in colloquial English it is often applied to action and thoughts as well. One might say “I’ve gained momentum on my project”, or perhaps “My income stream is gaining momentum”, or even “My relationship with my sister is gaining momentum”.
This article will refer to momentum in these terms, rather than what physics typically refers to as an ‘object’.

Continue reading “The Momentum of Belief” »


Self discovery can be likened to the layers of an onion, each layer containing valuable information about the emotional healing that has to be addressed in order to reveal  your true nature, that which lies in absolute Love. When we heal one layer, another surfaces, the pain that lies underneath is a  juicy layer that we’ve yet to discover and understand…our happiness awaits us within, if we take a close look at the internal abyss. Continue reading “Peeling Back Layers: The Human Onion” »

charlie-brown-hockey-stickWhenever I think of “Saved by the Bell” I feel a shiver run down my spine. When watching almost any daytime television show, I feel a nauseous sentiment of wasting my time, and with this show in particular I feel extremely ill.

Instead of running away from uncomfortable feelings like that, I’ve been chasing them down over the past few years and allowing them to teach me more about myself. So I went for it: I watched some of the original Saved by the Bell episodes, then Saved by the Bell The College Years, then Saved by the Bell Behind The Scenes, and even read bits and pieces of books mentioning the show. Continue reading “Comic Relief” »